The best parenting help in the world would be if every toddler carried a personal user manual to help parents through the tough times of toddlerhood. Sure, other moms, dads, and professionals offer a lot of helpful advice, but every child is different and has a different temperament, so often parents when using parenting aids to help raise their kids end up repeating on the basis of experiments. Much of the parenting process is trial and error, and don’t give up until you find the best help for you and your child. A perfect example is a toddler’s bedtime — getting them to bed in a hurry and staying in bed all night.
This special parenting aid is about helping you avoid mistakes that ultimately slow down our efforts and prevent us from succeeding faster. When dealing with young children, no matter what technique you use in any situation, these nine slips should be avoided to help your ride be a little less bumpy and support whatever technique you use in any situation.
Slippage #1: One-on-one is not enough
No doubt family time is important, but be careful not to overdo it and focus more on one-on-one time with each child. Professionals have been emphasizing to parents how children, especially toddlers, enjoy one-on-one time with their parents.
Just play with them on the floor. No distractions, no TVs, no phones – just you and your kids. Let him see that at that time he is the only thing that matters.
Slip #2: Inconsistency
Consistently etched into your toddler’s life, it will reward you with a more durable and lovable toddler. Young children especially thrive when they know what to expect. Like consistent bath times and bedtimes, even what happens when they don’t act.
Parenting help to help with this is maintaining a regular routine for your child. Set up a system with your partner ahead of time that both of you will use when something goes wrong with your child. Make sure your caregiver follows the same regime and make it clear that she must follow the same regime as you and your partner, whether she agrees or not. As your toddler grows through childhood, the system will change and revise.
Slip #3: Too much explanation
Dr. Phelan explained that when parents say “Do notToddler insists on something, and then the parent starts explaining, explaining again why—this is what Dr. Phelan calls the talk-persuasion-argument-shouting pattern. Arguing follows the toddler The child’s tears went back and forth and further agitated among the parents.
Once you have the law in place, avoid eye contact. If the toddler is disobedient, give a brief verbal warning. If the toddler is persistent, then you decide to take any consequences for that misbehavior, such as a timeout, or once they’ve got the law in place, some parents will simply ignore their toddler’s persistent demands. I use this with my toddler and it works great. I said once that if she argued, I would give a brief verbal warning, and if she went on, I would ignore her request in the particular situation at hand. Remember, toddlers aren’t adults and they can’t grasp why things happen, so explanations don’t make sense other than frustration.
Slippage #4: Offer only toddler food or favorite foods
Feeding a toddler only fish and chips or macaroni and cheese will stop him from wanting to eat anything else. Doing this early will result in you having to break bad habits and implement new ones, which we all know can be a daunting task.
Encourage your child to eat well-established, healthy foods as early as possible. If you do this early, you will find that they are less willing to try new foods and have a wide range of cravings for different types of foods.
Don’t always fall prey to their, “I don’t like it!” Introduce one new food at a time, and if they resist, wait a week before trying the same food again. Toddlers who are accustomed to eating the same children’s food will often say they don’t like another food just because they don’t want it, but after a few tries they usually go for it, expanding their meal range.
Picky eaters are common in young children, so by introducing new foods on a regular basis, you can help them accept different types and flavors of food. If they fight you, don’t make a fuss and don’t make yourself your toddler’s personal chef because that opens up another can of worms you have to deal with.
Mistake #5: Giving too much help
When you see your child taking the time to do something or struggling a bit, think twice before you step in and help. By continually helping your child before you give him a chance to succeed, you are sending him a message that he is incompetent or powerless. You will also interfere with their ability to be self-reliant.
Of course, there are times when a toddler does need help, but give your child a chance to figure it out on his own. When you do help, avoid doing tasks for him. Just offer a little help and let him go on by himself. Cheer on your child as he completes tasks and encourage him not to give up. Children need to learn to endure struggle and perseverance, which are important parenting skills taught in early childhood.
Slip and fall #6: Potty training too fast
Another very common mistake is that parents are quick to trick their kids into toilet training. They tend to use harsh and sudden reprimands, which can turn into a power struggle and give their toddler a very negative, unpleasant tone that often backfires and doesn’t get the results they think it will. This behavior can easily lead to training taking more time, making your child feel unsafe and less likely to even attempt to use the toilet.
Parenting Help says parents can set the tone for their children by introducing the toilet and briefly explaining its purpose. Consider showing your child how to use the toilet by using the toilet yourself so he can watch. When the time is right, your child will want to imitate you, at which point you can compliment him on his wonderful new toilet skills. Don’t forget to introduce techniques for hand washing and toileting, making both tasks a complete measure.
Slip and fall #7: Big kids bed too fast
I’ve always been confused as to why this slip is so common. Not only does the crib keep them safe, but it also helps develop good sleep and bedtime habits. Sending him to bed before he’s ready can disrupt his sleep patterns, and parents can be in a state of exhaustion when they find themselves in bed with their toddler until he falls asleep or the other way around. It’s all too common pictures of toddlers waking up in the middle of the night and crawling into bed with mom and dad.
When your child starts crawling out of the crib or asking for an actual bed, this is the perfect time to start switching from crib to bed. This usually happens between the ages of 2 and 3.
Slip #8: Allowing Too Much TV/Movie Time
The pros will tell you that toddlers who watch too much TV tend to have problems learning later, according to recent research. Too much TV can also foster laziness, and you’ll find that your kids don’t want to do anything but watch TV. Watching too much TV has also been linked to children who were overweight as children.
Instead of watching TV, keep your child active by helping him use his imagination through pretend play, creative play, reading and outdoor activities. Talk to your child to improve language, oral skills and listening. The less time children spend watching TV, the better.
Slip #9: Dealing with tantrums
It’s a parent’s worst nightmare, especially when it happens in public. Why? We feel judged, for whatever reason, a toddler throwing a tantrum in public makes parents feel like they’re not parenting enough, which is ridiculous because all toddlers throw tantrums, no matter what What is the level of upbringing of their parents.
There is no point in trying to convince your child not to throw a tantrum, nor is it pointless because it will only make things worse and make your child cry more. Remember, it’s your toddler, not the person and their opinion, that counts. Not to mention that most of these people just forget they were in the same position as you, or they just haven’t dealt with their kid’s tantrums. Ignore the glare; don’t even look around to see if anyone is looking at you. If anyone has something to say, smile and ask if they remember the toddler days. Then, take your child to a place away from the public eye and let the tantrum take its course. Once your child has a tantrum, give him a loving smile, hug him, and move on with your day.
With this parenting method, you now know 9 mistakes to avoid in your toddler years that will help make parenting a little less bumpy in early childhood and add more value to your parenting skills.
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